More tragedy, woe, afflicts Clinton campaign
After six weeks to focus on winning only Pennsylvania, Team Clinton decided to utilize the theme of Hillary as Rocky. As a result, her once-daunting 173 pt lead in the Pennsylvania polls has shrunk to minus three. Undeterred, Clinton also managed to lose the primaries of North Carolina, Oregon, Columbia, Mars, and tomorrow it’s expected Obama will get the endorsement of Chelsea Clinton and all the drunken whores hosting Air America talk shows.
In her effort to gain the delegates of Florida, she re-released her campaign’s statement released last September 1st:
We believe Iowa, New Hampshire, Nevada and South Carolina play a unique and special role in the nominating process.
And we believe the DNC’s rules and its calendar provide the necessary structure to respect and honor that role.
Thus, we will be signing the pledge to adhere to the DNC approved nominating calendar.
A new addendum to the old statement clarified: “We signed on a few hours after Obama did because we didn’t realize he secretly had organized a fiendish plot not to count Floridian delegates and he offered me candy and wiggled those sexy ears at me. So blame him, not Harry, Chris, Joe, Bill or John. I always meant to count the Florida delegates and secretly crossed my fingers to make sure I could.”
In a related development, New Hampshire and Nevada issued this joint statement: “Say what? She reneged? Fine then, we want a do-over, too, because that Obama guy’s looking better now than he did during that January white-out.”
Later today, Clinton will speak to gun control advocates to announce she finally pried Charlton Heston’s gun out of his cold, dead hands.
