Obama pwns McSame
John McDesperate will be forced to pull out all stops to try and avoid the worst loss by a Republican since Barry Goldwater 44 years ago. But that doesn’t mean the election’s a lock for the Democrats, either.
Nancy ‘We surrender!’ Pelosi has indicated they might come to a compromise on a co-presidency in return for a Republican promise to “never say mean things” about her and Harry ‘More Like Peachfuzz’ Reid.
“We get the best of both worlds with the compromise,” gloated Pelosi, “we’re just waiting for Steny ‘Two Bit’ Hoyer to hammer out the details with the screwdriver Karl Rove so graciously loaned to him.
“The Republicans won’t be able to say Democrats are weaker than a girl and they promise to kill the icky spiders.”
A source inside Reid’s office admitted the deal almost didn’t get made. Obama had agreed it was a good bipartisan approach for him to provide McGeezer with a booster chair so he could see above the edge of the Oval Office desk so long as the steering wheel on it was a genuine fake.
“He was worried Senator McMayday would crash the desk into something otherwise,” the source admitted.
But the final stumbling block was the hardest. Per the source, “John will only get to do the presidenting while Obaby is having his way with Cindy McPeroxide’s mouth.
“The plan hit a snag when the Republicans insisted the Windy City Mandingo had to pretend to enjoy it, as it’s against the culture of Muslim queers to enjoy sex with female goats, if they come from Arizona, but Mrs. McClueless overcame that with the promise of free beer for life.”
Disclaimer: As an advocate of equal opportunity, I apologize for leaving out retards, gimps and midgets from the narrative, but they were all busy at the Capitol, voting to provide immunity to the corporate telecom Christian lesbo pedophiles while Cheney was shooting pearls in Lieberman’s Orthodox Likud face.
