… as well-deserved fodder for late-night, early morning and midafternoon comedians.

I’m sorry. I watched in shock when Dan Quayle became a VP nominee, selected by the elder George Bush. By any measure, in the table of elements, his atomic weight was zero, a putty of a putz that fortunately never got his hands on actual power. Worried that he might become a cancerous tumor, he ultimately proved to be naught but a benign colon polyp.

The pick made sense eventually, when I became acquainted with the persona of the younger George. Quayle’s gaffes were very Dubya-esque, minus the assholian nasty side. He was the son George the First dreamed of having: somewhat pleasant in his stupidity.

And now we’ve got Palin - soulmate of another non-reformed reformer - and some are warning against underestimating her. Nope. Not again. I won’t buy that crap from cowering Dems or liberals who jump at every McCain surprise, fretting that it’s a fresh portent of the end times.

I’ve gone back and scoured over the records of Obama and Palin and Biden and McCain. And frankly, her possession of a vagina is the only rationale for her being thrust to a level above her experience, intellect and capacities. It used to be called the ‘Peter Principle’ but the ‘Palin Principle’ proves just as apt. A visit to Kuwait? Obama’s 1984 Bachelor’s thesis on Russian nuclear disarmament surpasses that in foreign policy understanding. Sitting on a city council in a town of 6,000 is how one learns Roberts’ Rules of Order, not how one gets educated about the SALT treaty, an enemy’s nuclear capacities, or how an American company does business in a friendly foreign nation. Voting to get a pothole fixed in 1992? While Palin was doing that, the Obamas directed a voter registration drive effort for Project Vote, where they directed 700 volunteers who registered 150,000 voters. While Barack was recruited to begin teaching Constitutional law at the conservative University of Chicago, had begun working as an associate at a a 12-attorney law firm specializing in civil rights litigation and neighborhood economic development, and also had begun serving on the boards of several civic and philanthropic foundations with larger budgets than Wasilla, Alaska ever dreamed of.

My initial reaction Friday was to pop off with a bit of satire. Then I presented a serious analysis. On further reflection, her selection deserves no less than open and perpetual mockery. This isn’t about the Mayberry Macchiavellians Part Deux. It’s more like Aunt Bea teaching Goober to pee.

Call me a sexist pig or whatever you want. But this isn’t close to Mr Smith Goes To Washington. This is a reformer - turned Tammany Grange Hall Boss when it suits her. This is a small town mayor tasked with breaking tie votes in the Senate, if a tour guide will only show her where the Capitol Building is, then leads her to the proper floor. (Go right from Alaska a bunch, and it’s a bit lower than Canada, over near that big blue area on the map. Look for the red star.)

It’s not McCain that deserves the greatest dissing for picking her. It’s the 48.3% of the Alaskan electorate - that’s under 115,000 of its 670,000 residents (roughly 1 out of 6) - who considered her capable of being governor. Couple the crowd for Obama’s speech at Invesco Stadium (84,000) with the number of students at the Denver-based University of Colorado (28,000) and that’s just 3,000 shy of the total number of voters who made Palin a governor. Now I know Alaska has a significant shortage of women, but hey, you hosers, that wasn’t an American Idol vote for the sparkly-toothed singer with the hooters. That’s supposed to be an important elective office.

You elected a complete contradiction. Economically, she’s a… conservative socialist. She likes her endangered species … to stay endangered if they’re big and scary. She wore a Buchanan for President button … but didn’t really support him. She smoked marijuana … but didn’t like it. Utilizing the power of government improperly is a corruption that must be stopped … unless you’re the governor and an underling isn’t doing something improper to avenge your family involved in a domestic dispute that courts and laws were built to resolve. She likes her gay friends just fine … but is committed to keeping them uncommitted with a constitutional amendment that would be the first in US history to sanction the denial of rights.

And now she’s the representative of the advance of woman through the glass ceiling … to a position where she’s supposed to do stuff daily without any idea what people in that position do. But she’d like to take away the rights of women to decide what will go on in their own bodies right after they’ve been raped?

Look, I really enjoyed Northern Exposure, but I’m pretty sure that was a fictional sitcom. Are you trying to tell us this really passes for normal up there? This is like a fraternity prank after the guys sat down to smoke a salmon. In a bong.

I am wholeheartedly in favor of a citizen legislature that grants lots of room for responsible citizens from many professions to take part as our representatives and lawmakers. I don’t favor a Congress overloaded with lawyers and business executives that’s still way underrepresentative of the majority of our population: women. Sarah Palin has enough civic duty credentials to aspire to the state or national legislature and to convince voters she should get a majority of their votes. And she also has every right to accept John McCain’s offer to run for VP.

I am not a majority of voters. I’m an amateur election analyst. I’m absolutely convinced that Senator McCain has made a massive campaign blunder by nominating a person without background or training in foreign policy, international relations, military defense or national security, the chief responsibilities of the executive branch of the most powerful country on the planet. I could not care less whether such a person is a man, woman, hermaphrodite, vegetable or mineral. All would be unqualified to step into the chief executive role in an emergency without such experience or training.

A decade of public service in a town of 6,000 getting elevated to a state governorship is - I believe - already an unprecedented giant step above what any male mayor in US history has accomplished except those who had to do so at the creation of the positions when their states were created. She’s achieved a promotion without parallel in well over a century. And it’s simply ludicrous to believe that her acceptance of the offer will enhance, in any way, the election of John McCain to be our next president.

In the process, she can actually damage the advance of women through that top ceiling. Those who believe women aren’t up to that task will try to advance that lie with any campaign misstep she might make, including some of the statements she’s already made.

Track, who joined the US infantry in September last year, is about to be deployed to Iraq. “It has really opened my eyes to international events and how war impacts everyday Americans like us,” she said.

Really? She just grasped that in the last year?

As a citizen, I’m extremely irritated by any potential setback for women to advance in public service at any level of elective office. I helped raise three daughters to believe there is no limit to what they can accomplish by adhering to the law, getting better educated, working hard and persistently. As I’ve seen growing numbers of women filling Senate and Governor seats, I’ve long believed that last glass ceiling would be broken by extraordinarily talented and experienced women whose achievements in office would set a standard that few male presidents have ever matched. And before my daughters reached the age of eligibility for the office (35).

I never taught them that life would be easy or fair, and I never suggested a dishwasher should advance to restaurant manager in one step then become CEO of McDonalds in the next, risking massive failure at each promotion that could risk the livelihoods of many, many others. Had I advised that, a mental health intervention would have been in order.

I’m not pissed at Sarah Palin for believing herself capable. I fully anticipate that most women voters will disagree. I’m really pissed at McCain for potentially setting back the advance of women by creating a convenient foil for his forthcoming loss. So remember, it will be his choices that
cost him the election. It won’t be Sarah Palin’s fault, but Republican misogynists will soon enough be making that claim. Bet on it.

And consider the views from Wasilla… including her own mother-in-law. No wonder Harry Reid says several Republican Senators have confided that they won’t be voting for McCain in November. I imagine there’s a number of far more qualified elected Republican women who’ll be among them.